You know, that part of the web-site where the artist tries to convince you that everyone from David Bowie to the Dalai Lama, Pavarotti to the Pope and Robbie Burns to Robbie Williams thinks he is wonderful and that simply scores of legendary musicians are just falling over themselves to play with him? well?uh? as Ken says himself: "I once played a tune to a guy on a bench at a railway station and he thought I was brilliant; he then threw up copiously and collapsed in drunken heap on the platform." YES, IT'S THE REVIEWS PAGE
If that has not satisfied your appetite for reading ridiculously sycophantic reviews, gratuitous name-dropping and nauseatingly self aggrandising hype, here are a few more gems:"with his blond curls, crystal clear voice and fingers gracefully plucking away at his harp he is the perfect image of the Celtic bard" ABOUT KEN PARSONS
NL 20 Amsterdam magazine (I think she just fancied me a bit, don't you?)
" with a blend of song, poetry and satire Ken Parsons both entertains and challenges his audience"
Review at Hollands notable Oerol Festival ( deep, huh! Bertolt Brecht eat your heart out!)
" Rock n Roll musical comedy at its best. A phenomenal act" Johnny Hollywood. Presenter of Comedy Show in Flannagans, Cologne
"a born performer, a natural showman"
P60 review (say no more)
"a very good presentation of artistic ideas"
ABC Treehouse review of open stage performance:"Ken Parsons is a singer/songwriter/poet full of humour and sharp comments on the life we lead, or does it lead us? Tonight along with 2 other members of his band he got the crowd clapping and singing along".
Hans Plomp, writer & poet ( I think that's what he said)
" ein toller Musiker, wahr, spielt mit solcher Freude, echt schön"
Speiche. Member of East Berlin's cult blues band Monokel. Owner of rock and blues bar. Can't speak German? Get a dictionary.
" a mass of curls and a very sympathetic impression"
Apeldoorns Stadsblad. Dutch girls have got a thing about curls, huh? I know I'm called Ken but I'm not a bloody Barbie doll; I'm a serious artiste, by god!
" a versatile and eclectic performing artist, a real gain for the market"
Review at historical Spaarndam's art market where I didn't sell any CD s. Honest, Mr taxman.
"the stylish atmosphere was enhanced by Ken Parsons' romantic harp playing"
Art market review, Oegstgeest. What? Nothing about curls, oh.
"your music's not really our thing: we don't want to educate them; we just want to get them drunk"
Pub owner in Stockholm. Buy this man a pint! Irish missionaries used to spread the word of god, now Irish publicans are spreading the word of Guinness.
"Musician of the month. Got all the drunken Shamrockers going with a good clean family set".
The Amsterdam Stun.
So my sound is does have booze-appeal after all! Check out the Stun for news from Amsterdam's English-speaking pubscene.
"the worst musical talent I've ever heard"
A guy at an Amsterdam gig.
"one of the best musicians I've ever heard"
Another guy, same gig, isn't life weird?
"can you call me back next week, I'm busy"
Various booking agents.
"can you call him back next week, he's busy"
Various booking agents' secretaries
"sorry, we're not able to take your call at the moment, but if you'd like to leave a message.."
Various booking agents' answering machines
"oh, no not that song again, daddy!"
My sons.
"a redundant Mohican with both feet firmly planted in mid-air"
My dad.
"An irresistible blend of traditional music, rock, pop, ska and hip hop. The combination of Ken and Frans' years of experience on the scene and the youthful energy and cheekiness of Kris, Berk and Daan ensure that the band provides what its name implies: atomic folk!" ABOUT NUCLEAR KAZOO & ZIBABU
Music Review (in other words: a couple of old burn outs and three juvenile delinquents)
"They play a host of instruments: guitars, bass, drums, violin, mandolin, tin-whistles, bag pipes and Celtic harp and all five of them sing"
P60 Review. ( So, if we don't make it as a band we can always open a music shop, I suppose.)
"Anyone who thought that everything had been done in the genre of folk rock and crossover styles of music should really see Nuclear Kazoo, quite refreshing, quite unique"
The Urban Folkie, fanzine. ( Have fun looking for this magazine, I made it up)
"you guys made the evening"
Brian, host of the spoken beats evening at our CD release party in the Winston, Amsterdam. Loved us; we didn't even have to pay to use the toilet.
"A great show guys, sounded deadly, now where's the beer"
Chairman Bone, loony scouse poet
" The best way to describe the sound of Zibabu, the winners of the GPVDBS (regional competition) would be a gentle breeze which turns into a thunder storm. The three guys play a blend of ska, punk,funk,rock and hip hop all neatly packaged into one song! Always entertaining, and the quick changes of style and tempo often wrong foot the audience. Tonight they will be two members stronger and appearing in their folk rock formation "Nuclear Kazoo". The stage peformance is sure to be even more energetic and will explode into a veritable musical orgasm!"
Review for gig at Ex Voto, Voorhout.( Musical what? Somebody get me a dictionary..)
" oooo uuuuh iiiii eeeeoh ja! oh mein Gott! oh ja, ja, ooooooo ja, ja, ja..uuuuuuuhhhh"
Kris's Berlin groupie.